Worth 1000 Words

War Photographer

At the beginning of the “War Photographer” video, it seemed as though Jim was very disconnected from his subjects. The manner in which the video was filmed made it seem as though there was an invisible barrier between the photographer and the subjects that he was shooting. At first, it was hard for me to understand how someone could put themselves into situations of starvation and genocide and intense pain and seemingly feel nothing about the people that are his subjects. I also thought that he may have been standing further away from the people than the video camera angle made it seem. He seemed to be right in front of them in a really emotional moment, and they didn’t even seem to notice him.

As the video went on, I learned that as he stated, “In times of war, normal codes of civilized behavior are suspended. It would be unthinkable to document people grieving in normal times.” But because the times that he is photographing in are far from normal, these people have come to trust him to document the hardships that they are going through. He is far from distant (as I had originally thought.) He is the voice of people who have become victims, and he is being trusted to share their story. He hopes to bring about change, and I thought that was very powerful.

Something that I found to be especially gripping about this video was the fact that looking at the pictures by themselves created a powerful image, but when I heard the story behind them they seemed to be turned into more for me. I read a book called “An Ordinary Man” about the genocide in Rwanda. It was the true story about the man who inspired the movie “Hotel Rwanda.” I think that often times someone can be told that “Between April 6 and July 4, when the Tutsi rebel army captured the capital of Kigali , approximately eight hundred thousand Rwandans were slaughtered. That’s eight thousand lives a day. More than five lives per minute.” Being told something like this is hard for someone like me to comprehend, but seeing the photos taken in Rwanda and thinking about the book made the tragedy that already touched me take a new life. The fact that his images are places in magazines alongside the stories of the people in them is very powerful to me. I also thought that the fact that Jim took photos of the people that had been massacred and then weeks late took photos of the people who most likely did the killing dying themselves was also very interesting.

When Jim started talking about the photos he had taken of people dying of starvation in Africa, I found this to be the most gripping portion of the video. For a larger part of the video I wondered how someone could witness this much pain and need without getting lost in the desire to do something about it. It wasn’t until almost the end of the video that I realized he is doing something about it. Jim is bringing attention to topics and people all across the world in countries including our own. He is creating an awareness that needs to created, and he is providing images that make something that is incomprehensible—something that people can begin to wrap their heads around. He spoke of the starvation in Africa. As he did so, he made a point of saying that people need to know that the people being photographed are the ones that are receiving aid. They are not simply people who are starving that are photographed and then walked away from. I think this fact was supposed to provide comfort to the viewer, but walking away from this video I feel haunted by that fact. The people in these photographs were receiving aid and food, but they looked like skeletons shrouded in skin. There was an image of a toddler who was lying next to what looked to be a family member who had died. If this is what the people who are in feeding centers look like, what condition is everyone else in? Jim said that, “famines are the oldest weapon of mass extermination and one of the most effective.” I am left with the images of these people, and I think I will be for a long time to come.

Proposal #2

This project would be one with more of an environmental feel to it. I would like to go to local landfills and photograph the waste that we create in Tucson. I don’t think that I should have a problem getting into the landfills or photographing in them. It seems to me so far that the only time special permission is needed to be in one of these places is when you are actually dumping something. I feel that I would be able to document the amount of waste (I am still unsure if it would be considered a large or small amount of waste) in an interesting way.

I think that this would be a good location to shoot in because I often find items that have been discarded as interesting and often unworthy of being thrown away. I think that it would be very interesting to see what people throw away over the next couple of months.

There are a few paths that I think that this project could take: If I am able to capture images of items that people would still use, I would like to create diptych images of the discarded item and something similar being sold at a yard sale or second hand store. I think this would be a good way to display the idea of waste, and I think this is something that is very important given our current economic climate. If I am unable to do this I still think that it would be interesting to document the state of the landfill: the people who come, the way it looks, how much it costs, maybe illegal dumping spots that do not require payment, etc. I think that there are a lot of interesting directions that this project could take, and I believe it would result in something I have yet to have previously documented.

The first step I would take with this project would be to go to the landfill for a few days in a row and see what I ended up capturing during these shoots. After this preliminary step, I think I would be able to more accurately decide which way this project wants to go. I don’t anticipate too many problems with bringing this project to fruition other than a possible lack of subjects to shoot.

Proposal #1

This project would be an autobiographical one. I want to try to explore a health condition that I have had since birth. Previous to this I have written a short story in which I have tried to explore my history involving this disease. I mapped out my relationship to my father (the person who I received the gene from), when I first discovered that he was sick, when I first discovered that I had the same disease, and how I now feel as the disease progresses.

My plan to document this project through photography would be to photograph my doctor visits, blood work, and possibly the future that awaits me when the disease progresses e.g. dialysis, transplant, etc. I do foresee HIPPA getting in the way. I understand that In a lot of cases I might not be allowed to photograph in dialysis centers or areas where there may be kidney patients. I think that I could work around this problem by showing my future through different avenues. One Idea that I have had for this is to photograph the medications that I am taking now as my present and the medications my father is taking as my future.

I also wonder if the timetable will be a problem. Although this is a condition that impacts my everyday life, it is not something that I can show in an everyday way. I do have blood tests and doctor appointments in the next month, but I wonder if I can show these things in a way that would be interesting to anyone else, In addition, when I write about these things, I find that I still write with a little bit of discomfort or distance from the subject. I wonder if I would shoot in the same manner.

In class we had a lecture in which we talked about capturing an image of a person or a self portrait without including images of the actual person. I think that this is the method that I would want to use to capture this project. I would like to show the perspective of having this disease through each stage of my own personal discovery through my own eyes without including images of myself.

Going to Space

This body of work was meant to display ten Photographs that I would want to take with me if I were to go to space, and I was unable to take anything or anyone with me. I tend to be someone who attaches to my heritage and the people in my family. I included an image of a cow skull that my grandmother had painted. My family has Sioux indian heritage, and I feel that this skull enables me to stay connected to not only my heritage but memories that I have with my family. I included images of my dogs and a blanket, because these things inspire a feeling of comfort and companionship for me. I also felt that while I was in space I might need an escape from the mundane, so I included an image of books that I have read. I have always found that books provide me with a feeling of ease an escape that I have not been able to find elsewhere. I felt that if I were able to look at the image of the books I would be able to take myself back not only to the characters and scenes in the books, but also the memory of where I was, what I was experiencing, and the emotions that were invoked while I read. Lastly, I included images that would take me back to my boyfriend. We have just starting living together, and our schedules are very different. We don't get to spend a lot of time together, so I cherish the moments that we do. (Even though they are often simply moments where he sleep next to me while I watch TV on the couch.) Everyday, he comes home, takes off his shirt, and places it on the ottoman. I find this incredibly irritating, but I think if I were away this would give me an image where I might find solace.

Memory for Memories Sake

I viewed the daily compulsion to take photos as a desire to document the life and activity the surrounded Ms. Singer rather than a compulsion. “Compulsion” sounds like a negative term. It seems to imply that the person who is experiencing the compulsions has no control over what they are photographing. It seems to me, that she has complete control over what she photographs. I thought that it was incredible that she could continually find inspiration the twenty mile stretch that she had been photographing for most of her life.

The museum Curator saw these photos as artwork. She said that she felt a connection with them, and she wanted to own them. I think that anyone who can find inspiration in things that they see every day and create what others also see as artwork, have a very gift. She taught herself about f-stop and taught herself to have an eye. I think that what she has is not a compulsion but a desire to create art and capture the beauty in things that the people around her come to find as ordinary or mundane.

I have a hard time finding interest in the things that I see every day. I often find that if I am not experiencing a new activity or a new environment, I have a hard time finding inspiration. During the summer semester, I had to drive to areas of town that I had not been to before in order to find inspiration. I began to feel trapped only being able to photograph in the town that I have spent the majority of my life. I think that it is incredible that she can find things to take 12 pictures a day for 35 years in the same 20 mile stretch.

Rather than just being a personal archive, it is an archive of the people and the town around her. Many women took up photography as a hobby in the 19th century as a vehicle of expression. Hers are special because she didn’t shy away from the painful aspects of life, like the death of her son and the abuse and slow demise of her husband. She also expresses a part of herself that she doesn’t seem to be able to express otherwise through her photography. She dresses up like a Native American. This could be a way for her to escape. Her work defines her.

If her “compulsion” wasn’t based on expression and she was simply taking pictures because she “had to” I may not view her photography as art. I think that her willingness to explore every aspect of her life, even the hard ones, is commendable.

Sally Mann

What I found interesting about Sally Mann was the fact that it had never really occurred to her to leave her home to make art. She has such a wide range of artistic subjects, but all of her work was created by using the people she is close to (sometimes animals) and the land on which she is accustomed. The fact that she found comfort and inspiration in “the local,” her family and the land, was inspiring to me. I have always found people that can create art out of what they see everyday, things that would normally become mundane to most, very fascinating.

She has taken a wide variety of pictures, starting with her children, then he farm, her “Marital Trust” with her husband, her husband’s bodily changes after his disease began to set in, and the death of her dog and the people in a nearby facility studying decomposition. It seems to me, that the intimate and personal relationship that she has with her work seems to create more pain when her work is scrutinized. Most artists form a bond with their work but when the subject matter is something close to their hearts it seems to me it would be harder. There seems to be a constant inner struggle in Sally between the art she wants to create and what she wants to leave behind. She wants to capture images of her lived ones, but she also doesn’t want to leave behind anything hurtful.

When Sally describes her children she said the pictures captured their heritage and a certain tenderness. The people who criticized them called them an abomination and speculated that they might be some form of child pornography. She also described how much the convict being murdered on her land changed her view on how the land is changed once death occurs there, and she spoke of how hard it was for her to let go of her dog once it had passed. These experiences spurred her body of work on death. She seemed to have put a lot of thought into how to make this body of work give its viewers a little hope as they left, and she decided to do so by creating a table that contained pictures of her children’s faces, vital faces. Her connection with the subject and the work seemed to make it much harder for her when the gallery decided to no longer show it.

I have mixed views on how I might feel about diligently photographing the people close to me during good and difficult times. I think that there would be a lot of good that would come out of capturing my loved ones in images. It could serve as a certain kind of therapy to cope with the hard times, and a way to capture the history of the people I love. I think that it would also be a struggle because when I was capturing the hard times that the people close to me were experiencing it would be hard for me to decide what to include. In order for the work to be art, I would have to include everything, but I think it would also be hard to capture all the hard times without causing more pain to my loved ones.

I have yet to document the intensely personal aspects of my life in a photographic sense. I have taken a lot of writing courses, and have documented personal experiences in that way. I have not been able to find a way to effectively document these experiences through photography. It is difficult for me to document these things because most of them have happened in the past, and I think that they would have to be depicted in a rather abstract way. I also find it difficult because personal aspects of my life seem to be more sensitive than exploring political views or landscapes. Capturing things that are close to you seem to be harder. I learned the same thing in my writing classes, because the artist often tries at first to try to maintain a distance from the subject. In order to affectively capture the essence of something, especially something that is really close to my heart, I have to find a way to keep myself from maintaining a comfortable distance. Making myself a little uncomfortable in the process.

What I learned in the film was that sometimes the most rewarding work can be work that helps the artist explore their own personal feelings. Sometimes the work is scrutinized by the outside world and critics, but if you have shown what you feel you need to show the work will eventually speak for itself. Even if it may at times only be speaking to you as the artist. It is hard at times to put your work ( and often subsequently your heart) on the line for everyone to criticize, but in order to create a body of work that has meaning one often has to explore something that is close to their heart.

I have yet to explore the more personal aspects of my life through photography, but the film made me want to try a little harder to express my own inner/deeper thoughts through a medium other than writing.